Why in between all the people here, of all the words written there, of all the ones that could possibly be willing to be out there you had to pick me?. Why did destiny had to put you on my way?. Why this foolish game of honesty has left me with nothing more than empty hands, eternal days, and loneliness?.
Why did you pick me, why did you let me stick around and then push me away once more. Why did you had to not miss me, to not understand me and to decieve me with your only truth when you knew that deep inside you were only trying to save yourself from yourself. Why did you had to let me choose in between my own heart and my wicked mind?.
Sad as it is life is this kind of mind game of coming and going and of making decision that will change your life forever. A word, a look, an attitude might change the whole course of your existence. You just appeared in my life and left it all messed up, without saying anything real, just the precise always useful words to not hurt and end like a hero.
Fortunately I learned something across the way, some good things, some bad things. I am ready, I know I am, and Im sure of what I want. On the downside, people never change, trust is no longer a useful word, honesty is confused with diplomacy, and selfishness rules our daily lives. We are constantly searching for what we think is right, our utopias and dreams are all one and the same and maybe is the only way to be kept alive in such a ruthless, careless world that has contaminated us with lies for us to use against ourselves.
Nothing is a coincidence and for sure your path and mine had to crash for us to change the course and just keep on going with the loneliness that is eating our souls alive. We havent found each other, we dont know where we are, we dont know where to go and we are so afraid of letting someone in our small but scary world that we keep on going with the darkness all around us.
Ive learned that it doesnt pay to be all the things the world teaches you to be, it pays to be the indifferent selfish and arrogant bastard that no matter what always gets away with it. It's too late for me, I left that road a long time ago, and I already lost its trail, I kept on the hard path, on the one less travelled, but that doesn't seem to matter to anyone anymore.
I've learned that no matter what you wouldn't listen, wouldn't even try, because you got blinded like everyone else, I dont blame you, I go blind every now and then and maybe I could stay there, but I dont know why I always keep coming back to the other side and try to fix the damage left behind by the careless souls.
I wish you can find what you are looking for, and that peace comes to your heart and mind, that the path opens ahead of you and that you can walk fearless towards happiness. The horse isn't dead, you just might dont want to have one, or you have killed the ones that have come near you, one more to add to your list that died after leaving you behind, but wounded he might safe his life again and be there when you are ready.
I understand you, entirely and deeply perhaps more than I could ever imagine. Dont let your soul fade away into confusion and or despair, if you find a helping hand dont take it for granted, dont let your eyes and smile rotten in this sick and crazy universe of menacing and blind people.
I wish you well, I hope the way finds you if you dont find it. I hope your mind can find whatever is looking for and that your soul may be in peace with yourself, so you can be in peace with the rest of us. I wish you find whatever it is that you wish to find, but remember as you once told me, sometimes it just comes in front of you and you may need to figure it out, because sometimes silence might deceive your soul, but you also have to dig and make an effort to find what you are looking for.
Maybe you are not ready, maybe we are not ready, maybe we will never be ready, and maybe, just maybe, I wasnt meant to be on your way. Unfortunately something pointed me out and here I am, watching the sunset in a disturbing silence with infinite empty space that I cannot share. My thoughts are louder than my voice, my soul is trying no to drown in the alcohol of melancholy and trying to still be up for the next fight. It is such a shame that you have deceived me, none of this would have happened, maybe life will just take us in our own way, but no, you had to say those words that weren't true and therefore, here we are, trying to say the things thru this cold and lonely words, that might not reach you, that might not reach me, and for sure we will share more of this lonely big empty spaced sunsets, wondering what will come next, which corner shall we pick to turn, who will be up next, who will raise its hand and then start all over again.
We will share many more of these moments, wherever we are, under the same circumstances we where before we met, trying to find something and searching for that something that makes life meaningful in such chaos.
Why did you have to choose me?. Why would you have to pick me out of all of those out there?. Why it has to be me the one that writes these words, when I should be holding you and fill up a little of your space, and you a little of mine, and the sunset will become a shared memory, and it will no longer be cold and melancholic, cause it will be ours. Unfortunately this will just remain as a dream of many sunsets to come, cause you have brought night towards our souls, and we might not find each other ever again..........
Why did you pick me, why did you let me stick around and then push me away once more. Why did you had to not miss me, to not understand me and to decieve me with your only truth when you knew that deep inside you were only trying to save yourself from yourself. Why did you had to let me choose in between my own heart and my wicked mind?.
Sad as it is life is this kind of mind game of coming and going and of making decision that will change your life forever. A word, a look, an attitude might change the whole course of your existence. You just appeared in my life and left it all messed up, without saying anything real, just the precise always useful words to not hurt and end like a hero.
Fortunately I learned something across the way, some good things, some bad things. I am ready, I know I am, and Im sure of what I want. On the downside, people never change, trust is no longer a useful word, honesty is confused with diplomacy, and selfishness rules our daily lives. We are constantly searching for what we think is right, our utopias and dreams are all one and the same and maybe is the only way to be kept alive in such a ruthless, careless world that has contaminated us with lies for us to use against ourselves.
Nothing is a coincidence and for sure your path and mine had to crash for us to change the course and just keep on going with the loneliness that is eating our souls alive. We havent found each other, we dont know where we are, we dont know where to go and we are so afraid of letting someone in our small but scary world that we keep on going with the darkness all around us.
Ive learned that it doesnt pay to be all the things the world teaches you to be, it pays to be the indifferent selfish and arrogant bastard that no matter what always gets away with it. It's too late for me, I left that road a long time ago, and I already lost its trail, I kept on the hard path, on the one less travelled, but that doesn't seem to matter to anyone anymore.
I've learned that no matter what you wouldn't listen, wouldn't even try, because you got blinded like everyone else, I dont blame you, I go blind every now and then and maybe I could stay there, but I dont know why I always keep coming back to the other side and try to fix the damage left behind by the careless souls.
I wish you can find what you are looking for, and that peace comes to your heart and mind, that the path opens ahead of you and that you can walk fearless towards happiness. The horse isn't dead, you just might dont want to have one, or you have killed the ones that have come near you, one more to add to your list that died after leaving you behind, but wounded he might safe his life again and be there when you are ready.
I understand you, entirely and deeply perhaps more than I could ever imagine. Dont let your soul fade away into confusion and or despair, if you find a helping hand dont take it for granted, dont let your eyes and smile rotten in this sick and crazy universe of menacing and blind people.
I wish you well, I hope the way finds you if you dont find it. I hope your mind can find whatever is looking for and that your soul may be in peace with yourself, so you can be in peace with the rest of us. I wish you find whatever it is that you wish to find, but remember as you once told me, sometimes it just comes in front of you and you may need to figure it out, because sometimes silence might deceive your soul, but you also have to dig and make an effort to find what you are looking for.
Maybe you are not ready, maybe we are not ready, maybe we will never be ready, and maybe, just maybe, I wasnt meant to be on your way. Unfortunately something pointed me out and here I am, watching the sunset in a disturbing silence with infinite empty space that I cannot share. My thoughts are louder than my voice, my soul is trying no to drown in the alcohol of melancholy and trying to still be up for the next fight. It is such a shame that you have deceived me, none of this would have happened, maybe life will just take us in our own way, but no, you had to say those words that weren't true and therefore, here we are, trying to say the things thru this cold and lonely words, that might not reach you, that might not reach me, and for sure we will share more of this lonely big empty spaced sunsets, wondering what will come next, which corner shall we pick to turn, who will be up next, who will raise its hand and then start all over again.
We will share many more of these moments, wherever we are, under the same circumstances we where before we met, trying to find something and searching for that something that makes life meaningful in such chaos.
Why did you have to choose me?. Why would you have to pick me out of all of those out there?. Why it has to be me the one that writes these words, when I should be holding you and fill up a little of your space, and you a little of mine, and the sunset will become a shared memory, and it will no longer be cold and melancholic, cause it will be ours. Unfortunately this will just remain as a dream of many sunsets to come, cause you have brought night towards our souls, and we might not find each other ever again..........
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